Love Tank

Have you ever read Gary Chapmans book about the Five Love Languages?  If not, you should.  It is great.

Here's the truth about the Moore Household:  Since moving here, we having figured life out yet, which has made life a little difficult. That, and the fact that it literally rained for a complete month until today.  The girls and I are all going a little crazy.  With no car and no friends around the corner, the girls are behaving worse and worse on a daily basis.  It's been a huge challenge for me to keep my wits about me when I want to run away, too.

On Monday night, I just about had a break down.  But then, a tender mercy happened.  I grabbed that love languages book and was thumbing thru it.  Braden came in and we started talking about the love languages of our girls.  And then the inspiration came.

If my girls' love tanks are empty, they are going to be begging for that love fill-up over and over, and more and more until their tank is full.  But because their way of begging is driving me insane, I'm less likely to be responding in the way they really need.  I was beginning to feel so overwhelmed because I felt like they had so many needs that I couldn't figure out where to start.  But then, it all fell into place.  If I focused on meeting that core need, speaking their love language, maybe the other behaviors would fall into place.

You know what?  It's working.  Keara's love language is Quality Time (as if anyone out there who has spent a minute with Keara didn't know that).  She is asking all day, every day for someone to play with her, be with her, talk to her, sit with her, tell her stories, play a game, etc.  And if you give a little time, she'll ask for more and more and more.  Why?  Because her tank is empty and she's just trying to fill it up.

Taryn's language is Physical Touch.  She is my "hold me", "rock me", "hug me" kid.  She loves to be read to, not only for the reading, but also for the holding.  She gives the best hugs all day long. 

So I've been trying to "speak their language" by doing more concentrated time with Keara and holding/hugging/rocking/kissing Taryn more.  And by having this new perspective, suddenly, their begging isn't quite so overwhelming.