Little Miss Mazie--One Week Old

Mazie is doing so well and we adore her.  She loves to eat, sleep, and be held.  She's sleeping like a champ and also stays awake during the day really well.  I'm basically a milk cow, making more milk than I ever have before.  And she is loving that!  We're trying to figure out our routine again and we're doing relatively well.  However, my mom leaves tomorrow...and then reality will set in! 

Here are some pics from today. Gotta run to story time!

She's Here!! And What an Entrance!

Welcome to the world!

Introducing

Mazie Cheri Moore
Born 11/8/11
10:27 pm
7 lbs 1 oz
19 (or 21) inches

You want the details?  Be forewarned that these is a detailed account.  Not the reader's digest, G-rated account. As most of you know, we were hoping she would come a little earlier than she did. She was "due" on the 3rd, but I didn't expect to go over my due date. My sister had her baby on Saturday (due on Friday) and with my mom already here to help with the baby, I was sure hoping that she would arrive before my mom did. But it was not to be.

I had Braxton Hicks contractions for the last couple months, but they were here and there and not increasing as we approached my due date. At 39 weeks, I was 1 cm dilated, at 40 weeks, I was 3 cm, and at 40 and 5 days (Tuesday), I was 3 1/2, almost 4 cm. So at least I was progressing. My mom arrived on Saturday morning and that was the first morning I was feeling a little icky. I felt not quite myself all day and that night, I had a few good contractions and felt that general "blah" feeling. I hoped that maybe things were moving forward. But Sunday came with no change.

Sunday I felt even more blech and icky with more contractions, but they never went anywhere. My mom and I went on a brisk walk and I felt a lot of pressure and tightening, but that subsided by the end of the day. My doctor offered to induce on Monday but I just didn't feel like it was necessary (part of me hoping that meant she was going to just come on her own soon enough).

Monday, I went in for an AFI ultrasound to check the fluid levels since my doctor would be heading out of town the next day and wanted to make sure I didn't need intervention while he was gone. I felt even more icky that day with more contractions which never went anywhere.

When I woke up on Tuesday feeling even more icky, with a lot of back aches and pressure, I had a feeling that it was the day. I had my doctor's appointment at 9:15 in the morning and just felt really tight. He didn't seem too hopeful and scheduled me for an induction next week, as well as additional testing throughout the week while he was out of town.

I went home and got to work trying to finish some things that needed to get done, in case she decided to come that day. I had approached the last few weeks with the mentality that if I stayed really busy and active, not only would I get a lot done, but it could only help in bringing her. So my mom and I organized our laundry room, cleaned out the toy room, tidied the rest of the house, and made one awesome dinner of pasta carbonara.

I had contractions throughout the day, but they were sporatic and very mild, nothing out of the ordinary. But around 6, I could tell they were a little regular, so I timed a couple, just to see. They were coming about every 5 to 7 minutes apart, but they were very mild. Still, because I had been working so much during the day and my back was aching so much anyway, I decided to take a bath while the girls got ready for bed. It felt good and the contractions continued, but still, very manageable and mild. After my bath, Braden was home and we got the girls in bed. I decided that it would be a good idea to get some relaxation practice in during the easy contractions, in case they continued, so I sat on the exercise ball and chatted with Braden and my mom for a while.

Around 8, the contractions were now quite noticeable and were getting a little more intense, but still nothing to write home about. In fact, I thought about sending an email to family, letting them know that we were in labor, but I wasn't really confident still that it was labor, so I didn't send it until later. The contractions remained every 5-7 minutes apart, but I did need to do some deep breathing with them.

About 9 or 9:15, I now needed Braden's help to get thru them. I needed to really focus and really breath, as well as use the hot rice bags on my back and lower front. I have back labor with all my girls and I found with this little one that changing position, being on my hands and knees, standing, kneeling over a chair, etc. helped me manage the intensity. Each contraction lasted a full 2 minutes but were still 5 minutes apart. Then they started going every 2 minutes, then 4, then 3, then 1 1/2 (lasting only 30 seconds), etc. They were sporatic again, but getting much more intense. At 9:30 or so, Braden got the car loaded and ready to go, but I told him I didn't feel like it was necessary to leave yet. I didn't think we had made enough progress and I didn't feel overwhelmed yet. In between contractions, I still had energy, focus, and felt renewed. A little later, I asked him to give me a blessing, and shortly afterwards, I had a couple contractions that lasted 2 full minutes and only gave me 30 seconds break in between. They were so intense, I said, "Okay, it's time to go." We left for the hospital around 10.

Thankfully, we live only a few blocks from the hospital, so we parked around 10 too. We had to walk to the ER entrance and I had about 5 strong, intense contractions on the way there. One lasted so long Braden got really worried that we were going to have the baby out in the cold. No, she had other plans.

We got to the ER entrance and they had a metal detector we had to go thru. But there were 2 people ahead of us, and I kept having contractions, so we'd get out of line, someone else would come, we'd get out of line again, etc. Finally, the guy manning the metal detector went to get a wheelchair and let us go thru. I normally would have walked and not gotten a wheelchair, but I was fine with it. In hindsight, I'm really glad I was in one.

We went to admitting, where the admitting lady asked me how far apart the contractions were. I told her every 2 to 3 minutes and she looked at me like I was lying to her. She then asked Braden if I was feeling any pressure (while I was having a contraction), and he told her I was. She replied, "Well, she doesn't look like she's in that much pain." I wish she could have walked with us to Labor and Delivery...

I was wheeled upstairs, stopping every minute or two to breath thru a contraction, which were getting really, really intense and I knew this baby was moving. I could tell I was getting really close to needing to push. We got out of the elevator and the nurse started taking me to triage when another nurse stopped her and told her to just bring me to Labor and Delivery. As we were heading down the hallway, I asked her to stop so I could deal with this contraction, but she said, "Let's get you into your room and then you can breathe." I'm glad she did. That contraction ended up breaking my water and suddenly the baby was descending, crowning, and birthing, with my pants still on and me in the wheelchair. I gave the play by play, "She coming, she's here!" and they fought with my very uncooperative stretch pants. Finally, the nurse got them to a point where she exclaimed "There's the baby!" I don't think they really realized how serious I was. She was born at 10:27. Had I been walking instead of in the wheelchair, I think she would have been born downstairs in the hall, with the world to see.

They placed her on my belly and then we noticed the cord was wrapped around her neck twice. Since I was sitting, having her on my belly was actually pulling the cord tight, so she briefly turned blue as we tried to get it loose enough to unwind. She was perfect, beautiful, and, as Braden said, surprisingly clean. The doctor arrived shortly thereafter and the nurse announced that the baby was already here. I absolutely loved holding her for a few minutes before I needed to move to the bed and deliver the placenta.

I only tore a tiny bit that required one stitch. As the doctor approached me with the needle and thread, without giving me anything to numb it first, I said, "Um...???" And he told me that stitching would feel the same as if he gave me the shot, so he just wanted to stitch me instead. Okay! Why not!

It was so nice not having any IV, pokes or prods, and just letting my body work with this baby. It was exciting, fun, and in many ways, funny. In the 9 months leading up to this, whenever I thought about the birth, it always involved her coming in the kitchen, in the bathroom, on the highway, etc. but never with a doctor. I'm grateful for that preparation!

I'm also so grateful that Mazie came when she did. First, Braden was able to go thru all his Tuesday classes, as it is his fullest day, as well as get a lot of studying in for his test today. I didn't need him until after his last class was over and then she came early enough that we could get to bed and he could sleep enough to go take his test this morning. He's been at school all day studying for his test tomorrow and finishing up a portion of his test that he took on Monday that is due tomorrow. He stopped by for 30 minutes or so this afternoon, but had to head back. I'm sure he'll be relieved for tomorrow afternoon to come, with all tests done, no work, and no school on Friday. He deserves a break!

Second, I'm so grateful that my mom was here so she could stay with the girls. It was SO helpful to have someone around to take care of them while I took a bath, and then for us to be able to leave when we needed to, because I don't think I would have called help in time. The labor shifted so rapidly that I don't think anyone could have gotten there before she would have been born. I'm sure she would have been born at home if my mom weren't there.
Braden told me he feels like he isn't very helpful during my labor, but I just have to say that he is AMAZING! Oh my goodness, while my labors may be sudden and fast and a whirlwind, the only reason I make it thru them is because of his focused attention, support, and help in keeping me calm and focused. Generally, I count on him only during transition, which comes and ends so suddenly and intensely that his reminders to "relax and breathe" aren't really effective in getting me to relax and breathe, but I can't describe how helpful it is to hear those words anyway, to hold his hand, to have him rubbing my arms. He is amazing and I adore him and fall in love with him more every time we go thru this together. I am so grateful for him!

The girls are in love, each in their own way. Keara is currently here with me in the hospital, laying in bed with Mazie, pretending to be trying to go to sleep. She is in heaven. Taryn loves to hold her but also gets so distracted by everything around her that we have to be constantly monitoring how she is holding her so she doesn't strangle her or drop her. Avery adores her and loves to hold her, but easily moves on to other things. They are so fun to watch!

Well, Mazie is crying now, so I'm going to go help her. But thanks for your love, support, and well wishes! We're so glad she's here!!

I Hate Wait...

This baby is being very stubborn.  And really not cooperating with all my well laid plans.  I guess that teaches me one thing...don't plan anything. 

We're now into Braden's test week, which means we're walking thru a mine field, trying to miss when he's actually in a test while still allowing him ample time to study for his tests.  One down, two to go. 

My mom arrived on Saturday for 11 days.  But I wanted those 11 days to fall AFTER the baby arrived, not before.  So every day that passes is one more day lost of my mom's incredible help.  Still, she works like a mad woman and my house has never (and never will be again) been so clean.  I wish I had her stamina, energy, positive attitude, and work ethic.  She is amazing.  I love her!

My dad arrives on Thursday night and we're supposed to be having a big family dinner on Friday at my brother's.  But...at this point, it looks like that is going to be cancelled too, as well as blessing the baby on Sunday.

And finally, my doctor goes out of town in 3 hours.  So, there goes the hope of having my doctor deliver me. 

I've tried everything...fast walks, long walks, soaking in the tub, pineapple, spicy foods, bouncing on the exercise ball, anything I can do to help this baby decide to come, but she just doesn't feel like it.  I've had plenty of contractions and I'm progressing dilation-wise, but she is too comfy in there.  I'm heading out right now for my doctor's appointment and we'll see if one last ditch effort will intice her to arrive.  If not, we may be facing induction on Sunday, unless she gets her act together before then.

I'm heading out.  Let's see if this baby will too...

Bedtime Battle--Part II

Over a month ago, I posted about our bedtime headaches.  Since that time, I received advice from many of you, as well as a request to share what I learned to help those of you who related to our experiences.  Here is my report:
We started out trying all sorts of suggestions.  I really liked the suggestion of one reader to have them stand in the corner if they chose to not lay in their beds (yes, Molly, I'm about to butcher the lie/lay rule here).  That made sense to me.  This is time to lie in your bed.  If you don't feel like lying in your bed, you may stand in the corner. 

Unfortunately, the girls would seek opportunities to stand in the corner.  And they wouldn't stand.  I would have to stay up there with them enforcing the consequence.  For a couple hours.  So that one didn't work for us.  I still love the idea, for those it can work for.

Another night, I decided that if they didn't feel like staying in their beds, they would then have to do what mommy was doing.  It wasn't play time, it was work time.  So I put them to work.  I had them do all sorts of chores until I could literally not think of another chore to do.  I made it as un-fun as possible.  Unfortunately, they thought this was WONDERFUL and couldn't wait until the next night when they could work again.  So that didn't work so well either.

I talked to my sister, my mom, everyone to get a grasp on things and finally my mom suggested something she has suggested many times in the past.  Her advice was this: read the book Children: The Challenge by Rudolf Dreikurs.  I heard her suggesting this when I was growing up and I always took offense to it.  Maybe that's why I never took her up on her advice in the last couple years.  But growing up, I thought the book was called Children the Challenge, as in children were the challenge.  Now I understand it is Children: The Challenge, as in the challenges of raising children.  Symantics, but it made a difference in my approach.

Anyway, the book was written in the 1960s and is WAY outdated.  Almost every example has to do with a parent "thrashing" their child or "whipping" them.  Other examples are just too picture perfect and unrelateable.  But that doesn't change the correct principles that are taught in the book.  I was so frustrated for the first 60 pages because I kept thinking "YES!  I get that!" but I'd never get a suggestion about what to do about it.  However, once the practical applications started flowing, I was able to implement a lot of things and we saw almost immediate changes in our family.

A few of the principles I like the most (which, of course, I learned as a Child Development major in college...but are hard to remember in the thick of raising kids) are these:

1. A misbehaving child is a discouraged child
2. Don't give undue attention

3. Win cooperation--don't force it (this one is HARD)
4. Withdraw from the conflict
5. Never do for a child what she can do for herself


Basically, every child seeks attention thru various means.  When they are seeking attention inappropriately or at inappropriate times (like you're on the phone or in the middle of a meeting), they are seeking undue attention.  When we respond to their attempts, we reinforce the negative behavior by letting them know that they can indeed get our attention in that way, even if the attention they are receiving is negative (like yelling, getting angry, etc.).  They will seek any way to get and keep your attention focused on them.

So our attempt to have them stand in the corner was completely ineffective because it still got them exactly what they wanted: our presence and continued involvement. 

I could see that Keara was definitely a discouraged child.  She kept seeking attention by being afraid of school...until we stopped paying attention to her whines.  She was acting abominably at bedtime because she wanted mommy to stay longer.  She would throw fits whenever I was talking to anyone else or on the phone to get my attention.  It was frustrating because no amount of positive attention given to her would reduce her inappropriate attempts to get undue attention.  However, once we started not giving undue attention and withdrawing from her attempts, she stopped seeking attention thru those means.

AND, since that time, she has gone to bed well every single night AND has walked right into her classroom at school without clinging to my arm.  She needed to be redirected on how to seek and gain attention.  We have had better days as a family in the last couple weeks than we've ever had, as we've implemented some of these changes in how we interact with our children.  The peace and lack of frustration has been a welcome change.

As for Taryn, who is my busy body, she has also gone to bed well every night in the last couple weeks, though some nights she needs a little extra help.  Still, like tonight, we started bedtime at 6:45 (meaning, get jammies on, brush teeth, etc.) and I was out of their room at 7:15.  Amazing.

Oh, and our current nighttime routine is this.  The girls have the time that I am putting Avery down to put on their pajamas, brush their teeth, go potty, and look at books.  They need to do this quietly and calmly.  If they choose to cooperate, then we have enough time to do snuggle time.  One girl stays on the couch reading while the other comes to mommy's room for a couple books, prayers, talking, and snuggle time...about 10 minutes.  Then they switch.  Sometimes, one is calm and the other isn't.  If she chooses to not cooperate to make bedtime successful, that is her choice.  But I will not be able to snuggle with her. 

After snuggle time, we go upstairs and they get in their beds.  I kiss them goodnight and tell them I will be back in 5 minutes.  We were noticing that when we would finish bedtime right when we brought them upstairs, they would be back downstairs within 5 minutes.  So we flipped it.  They can lie quietly in their beds for 5 minutes and then I will come back up with their water and I will lay with them and scratch their backs for a couple minutes.  If they choose to get out of bed and play instead, I cannot lay with them because, afterall, they are not in their beds. 

One BIG component of this book is that you need to be firm.  It is SO easy to say "Oh, you got back in your bed, so I'll give you another chance."  But I really like how the book teaches that the child can try again the next night, not tonight.  They already made their choice for tonight.  If you continually say, okay, you did it, forget the result of your choices, then they will always be pushing to see how far they can go before cooperating. 

Anyway, since flipping the 5 minutes, they have not come downstairs to go to the bathroom, which they were doing every night.  They aren't calling us, and they are lying still.  Taryn is so still and so calm by the time we come back that she is practically asleep.  What an amazing change, when she was always so wired every single night. 

I don't know if this will help you, but if you find yourself at your wits end about anything behavior-wise with your kids, just give the book a shot.  Take it with a grain of salt, but remember that these are solid principles from the past...that haven't been tainted by the permissive, overprotective, over indulging parent patterns of today.  So, just try it, I guess. 

A Trip to the Orchard

This is a little late, but at the beginning of October, we were able to go to the cities to celebrate my nephew's 16th birthday.  He is the sweetest guy in the world and chose to go to an apple orchard for his birthday.  I wonder if that had anything to do with the fact that his three little cousins would LOVE the orchard.  That would be just like him.

It started with the haystacks...

Thanks Jonathan, Rachel, and Susan for hopping on board so the girls could go.  I don't think I could have fit...

 They have this BIG AWESOME slide that the girls went down over and over and over.  I love the expressions on their faces!

Taryn LOVES Nathan!

There was a band playing and Taryn jumped up on the table with these kids and started showing her moves.  She has no fear and loves to dance!

 Not exactly sure what Avery is doing right here, besides enjoying a delicious Honeycrisp apple

 Running thru the trees

Anyway, we had a GREAT day!  It was so fun!

Oh And...

We still haven't gotten any snow.  We've had gorgeous weather, trick-or-treated without coats, and went for a walk around the lake tonight.  I love it!  And I check the weather every few days to see the status of the snow forecast, which keeps changing.  A couple days ago, we were predicting snow on the 6th and 8th.  Tonight, it shows no snow in the next 10 days, but instead 40s and 50s during the days and 20s and 30s at night.  At least we're getting a longer fall to make up for our long winter last year!  It has now been over 6 months since we last saw snow.  I'll take it!

The Belly

I see all these adorable pregnant women posting belly shots at 8, 12, 16, 20, 24, 28, 32, 36, and 40 weeks on their blogs and think, "I wish I did that."  Not necessarily for you all to see, but to capture this incredible transformation that happens over the course of 9 months.  So, here, for your viewing pleasure, are all the belly shots I've managed to capture or have captured during these past 40 weeks.

5 Weeks--No, I wasn't showing THAT much, but that shirt is definitely not flattering to a non-pregnant belly.  Even at 5 weeks, I still got asked by my dear friend if I was pregnant because of this picture.

13 1/2 weeks--My attempt to start capturing the growth in a formal way.



18 weeks--Doesn't look like much, especially compared to the month before.

19 weeks--Dude!  What happened! 

30 weeks--Photo Courtesy of Taryn

32 weeks--Photo Courtesy of Keara

34 weeks--Photo Courtesy of Keara

Oh wait, mom, I didn't quite get your belly in that one.  Better do panoramic!

36 weeks--Photo Courtesy of me...my camera can be a bit delayed... 

39 weeks--Photo Courtesy of Taryn--Loved this Halloween "Costume"

 39 1/2 weeks--Photo Courtesy of Avery

Today--39 weeks, 6 days--With no one around, I had to take my own picture using the mirror.

Seriously?  Who is in charge of cleaning that mirror?  I would if I could reach it but this belly keeps bonking into the sink...

And there you have it, folks.  It can't get much bigger than this before d-day.  Hopefully!



I think I need a new photographer. 

Taryn's "Bright" Idea

I keep forgetting to post this.

Several weeks ago, Taryn announced that she and Avery had decided on a name for the baby.

T:  Mom, we should name the baby "Bulb."
M: Bob?  Bub?  What did you say?
T: Bulb, mom.  Like LIGHT BULB.

This is why the girls are not consulted when it comes to naming the baby!

Things You Never Knew You Never Knew

You always hear people saying that in pregnancy, you're hotter (temperature-wise) than normal and than everyone else.  I've never found this phenomenon to be the case with me. 

With Keara, I was pregnant thru most of the winter and found that I was freezing cold in the mornings.  When we lived in Arizona, I was pregnant thru two summers with Taryn and Avery, with Avery being born at the end of August.  So I was REALLY pregnant during the worst of the summer.  But I never figured I was any more miserable than everyone else.  Arizona was hot and everyone was hot.  I didn't think pregnancy made it worse.

However,  this time around, I'm beginning to realize that I probably WAS a lot hotter than I otherwise would have been.  I have been so warm, compared to Braden, this fall that it is almost comical.  At night, when we would have the windows open and the box fan going, he would sleep under 4 layers, while I slept with a sheet.  Last night, he stayed up reading in bed and finally decided to go to sleep once his hands were so frozen that he couldn't really turn the pages anymore.  I lay sleeping, again, under the sheet and feeling a little too hot.  Then this morning, I went out to turn on the car to take Keara to school...in short sleeves, feeling quite comfortable, only to discover that the car was covered in frost and it was only 30 degrees. 

I'm suddenly feeling very concerned about how COLD I'm going to feel when I'm not pregnant anymore!!

Count Down

Has it hit you yet that Halloween is in just 5 days?  And that November, yes NOVEMBER, is in just 6 days?  Wasn't it just January?  And it is already November.  I remember thinking in March that November would never come as I hovered over the toilet, violently experiencing the joys of the first trimester, and yet here it is.  November.  Thanksgiving.  Christmas.  We're in the throes of autumn, which I absolutely ADORE, but very soon, we'll be wrapping up the year and putting away the decorations that bring so much joy and light to my life.  I love this time of year.  I just can't believe it's already here.

Which also means my due date is just around the corner.  8 days, but who's counting?  I'm hoping for a healthy baby and wonderful birth experience...and early or "on time" would be nice too.  My mom comes in town on the 5th, so I'm hoping this little one is here by then.  And yet, I stop to think about that and realize...that's in just a week and a half!  Seriously?  I just might be holding this little wonder in less than a week and a half?  Is that really possible?  I don't know why I'm having such a hard time wrapping my mind around the concept this time around.  It just seems like it's been off in the distant future for so long and I can't believe it's actually here.

I think one reason why the timing of this impending birth seems so odd is because I have had by far the least prenatal care of any of my pregnancies. With Keara, I did everything strictly by the book--every 4 weeks, 2 weeks, then 1 week until 41 weeks when she was born--that's like 14 appointments. With Taryn, I was a bit more flexible. With Avery, since I knew my doctor by that point, I worked it out to come every 6 weeks instead of 4, and then every 3 instead of 2 at the end. With this baby, I had an appointment in April, then May, then June. Then I had nothing until September with my new OB up here. I saw him again at the beginning of October and have my next tomorrow. So 6 appointments total so far. Enough for an ultrasound, glucose screening, and group B strep test, which was positive again. Still, it has made the whole experience seem a little less, um, timed? Maybe? I don't know how to say it.



I am concerned (and I'm trying to have positive thoughts so as to help the situation rather than compound it) that she isn't in the right position.  Sometimes she feels posterior, other times sideways, and tonight...breech.  I have my OB appointment tomorrow morning, so hopefully I'll learn a little more about her situation there.  A couple weeks ago, she was definitely head down and low, but she's not engaged anymore and is still floating.  I know that's common and normal for subsequent pregnancies, but I'd like to feel that she's settled and ready to come. 

But until she is, I still have 30 diapers to finish and an order for 12 yogurt tubes to send off.  Plus 20 other things that are still on my to-do list.  The girls halloween costumes are coming together and we have 3 parties to attend in the next 3 days. 

Hopefully, my next post will be filled with a happy announcement.  We'll see!

There it is...

I checked the 10 day forecast and there it is...the first forecasted day of "snow showers".  Of course it is in 6 days (on the 26th) so a lot could change between now and then, but we're really entering this new season.  Are we ready!?!

Sneak Peek!

Here's what I made last night...

Nesting?

We're counting down the weeks now...just 4 to go!  I can't believe we're really at the end of this pregnancy already, and yet I'm not sure I'm ready for it to be over!  I have so much to do...

They call it nesting.  I call it preparation.  And sure, do I really have to do ALL these things before the baby is born?  No.  But I know that life will be much easier afterwards if I do.

I started with making freezer meals.  In the end, I have enough meals put together or ready for 50 dinners.  FIFTY!?  Wow.  That was a lot.  This is the first time our freezer has been full.  Like really full.  Like don't buy anything that has to be frozen because it will not fit. 

I also had a bunch of orders (particularly yogurt tubes) that needed to get done.

And we're still trying to move in now that the basement is getting finished (though it should be officially finished this Saturday.  Hooray!!) so I've been organizing and unpacking.  I'd rather do it when the weather is perfect than in 6 weeks when it is snowing.  Last year's first snowfall was on November 13th.  That's a lot sooner than most of us realize...or want...

Oh, and I really wanted to get Christmas finished before the baby came so I could enjoy the season.  I've got half of it wrapped and the other half either planned, purchased, or started.  But I still need to get that done.

I needed to get things ready for when the baby does decide to come, like getting the hospital bag packed.  Not like I need it yet, but it is easy to do and check off the list so I don't have to think about it again.  So that got done.

And then, I am left with the little things I WANT to do to get ready for this baby.  Like making things.  I need to make her cloth diapers and covers, which I started weeks ago and still haven't gotten back to.  Tonight.  Must do tonight.  I also want a new mei tai carrier, so I need to make that too. 

But the most pressing thing for me was to recover my carseat...again.  With Avery, I made a cover that went on top of my existing carseat.  Like a glove, but one that I never absolutely loved.  Here's what it looked like:

This time, though, I wanted a more modern, more gender neutral, and more professional look.  Not so homemade.  So I followed the basic tutorial from Make It and Love It, made my own changes to make it easier, and ended up with this:

I love it!!  So, even if this baby has no diapers for her bum, she'll be riding in style!

Seriously, This is Getting Old

I know you're all tired of my posts being pleas for advice, but I appreciate the insights and ideas from those who have gone before.  Today's issue is not new and I'm sure I've posted about it before.  But I am at the end of my rope again!  I am SO sick of this that I think I just might scream.  We've been battling this problem for literally 3 years. 

I hate, with the deepest passion, HATE bedtime in our home.  Let me describe our day:

6:45 am-All the girls get up
7:15 am-Out the door to take Keara to school
8:05 am-Back home with T and A to get ready, have our adventure, etc.
11 am-Lunch
11:30 am-Naps/Quiet Time
1:45 pm-In the car to get Keara from school
2:30 pm-Home again for snacks
3-3:30 pm-Rest time (no sleeping, just alone time so Keara can unwind from school)
3:30-4 pm- Individual Chores/play time
4-4:30 pm-Mommy and me time/play time
4:30-4:45 pm-Scriptures
4:45-5:30 pm-play time while dinner is made
5:30 pm-Dinner time
6:00-6:15 pm-Dinner chores, pajamas on, teeth brushed, etc.
6:15-6:30 pm- Reading time
6:30 pm-Bedtime routine

Between 6:30 and 7 pm, we read either stories or, lately, a chapter or two from a classic.  While we read, I have soft music playing.  After reading, lately I've laid down with T & K and scratched their backs, talked about the day, or just snuggled for about 10 minutes each.  Then I kiss them goodnight and leave. 

Sounds like a good day and a good bedtime routine, right?

WRONG.  After I leave, it's like they think it's party time.  They get out of their beds, come down to go potty AGAIN, get in each others beds, run around the room, laugh, play...And the thing that really gets me is when Keara has this delight in her eyes that she's frustrating me.  It drives me crazy and really makes me mad.

We've tried everything:
*Letting them just enjoy being sisters and not worrying about how long it takes for them to go down.  But with our early schedule, if they're not getting enough sleep, they are monsters!  Keara loses her ability to function around 6:15 every night.
*Discussing the natural and logical consequences of their choosing to not go to sleep: being tired, needing extra rest time instead of play time the next day, having a hard time getting up in the morning.
*Deciding on ways to help them go to sleep.  Their suggestion was lay with them and scratch their backs.  Obviously, that's not working.
*Getting upset.  Obviously it doesn't work very well, but often times it at least gets them to stop their behavior long enough to shift and actually go to sleep.
*Enforcing completely illogical consequences: lose your blanket, for example.  This one was very effective because it shocked them into wanting to earn it back, but it always rubbed me wrong because it made no sense.
*Separating them and letting them fall asleep in different rooms and then moving them after they were asleep.  Yes, this worked really well.  But I don't believe it is the answer.  They need to learn to go to sleep together and to make the choice.  We can't have every girl in a separate room forever and they need to figure this out.
*Earlier bedtime or later bedtime.  But now with Keara in school, they can't go to bed any later than they are because they are so exhausted by 6:30 they can hardly function and otherwise Keara can't function the next day.
*Telling them they can have mommy/daddy time but if they don't go to bed well while the other has their personal time, then they lose their next turn.
*Bribery: If you go to bed well for 20 days, we can earn a trip to grandma's (that worked well, but after the trip, they completely regressed).  If you go to bed well two nights in a row, you can earn one PBS show.  That worked for 2 nights. 
*Laying with them until they fall asleep.  But I honestly cannot spend an hour every night laying with them waiting for them to fall asleep.  While this may be effective, it is not practical.  Plus, there have been several nights where they simply won't fall asleep with me there.

Once they are asleep, they are stars.  They rarely, if ever, get up in the night.  And if they do start on that habit, it lasts a day or two and then they're back to sleeping perfectly all night.  So it is truly only going to bed.  You could say we need to help them calm down, but they are completely calm by the time we leave their room.  And then they go wild.  Tonight, it has been 2 hours since I left their room and they are finally asleep. 

We'll come up with an idea and it'll work for a day or two and then it'll stop working.  I need a permanent solution.  Something that truly works.  I feel like there isn't a soul in the world who has this problem.  I know of plenty of people whose kids won't stay asleep or who wake up too early or wake up too often, but I feel completely lost in this problem. 

I know a big part of the problem is that Taryn is hyperactive and takes a really long time to fall asleep.  When she sleeps alone, she does great.  But having someone else in the room is really hard for her.  Lately, though, Keara has been just as big of a problem.  So I can't blame Taryn completely, though I know that Keara probably feeds off Taryn's energy. 

So, if you have a great answer, something that has truly worked for you, please suggest it.  Or email me at bradenandcheri at gmail dot com.  I am at a complete loss.  Ask around, get advice, whatever.  I need help.

I Do.

Wow, time flies.  I can't believe it's been almost 2 weeks since I wrote that post.  We're now into our third week of school and I have some advice in response to my last request for advice.

I realized, at the start of her second week of school, that Keara had switched from being truly nervous, to enjoying the attention she was receiving by not liking school, by clinging, and by crying.  She got sympathy from everyone...me, Braden, her teachers, her grandmas, everyone.  And we were talking about it with everyone, seeking advice. 

But when I stopped and paid attention to the whole picture, I realized that the sympathy and attention was actually perpetuating the problem.  So we flipped a switch and overnight, the problem changed.  That's not to say it went away, but immediately, we had less whining, less clinging, less crying.  She's gone 4 days of no tears at all and comes home much happier and excited about school.  The mornings aren't spent telling us that she doesn't want to go, but talking about what is going on that day.

What did we do?  We stopped paying attention to her complaints.  When she would say, "I don't want to go to school," we'd reply with "We understand.  Please get in the shower (or get dressed, or go to bed, or eat your breakfast, or whatever)."  We didn't dwell on the complaint.  And we explained to her teacher what we were doing and she jumped on board, not dwelling on Keara's crying, but moving on to the next thing. 

I didn't want Keara to think we didn't care, so we switched to focusing on the positive, like when she is happy, when she goes to school easily, when she has a great day.  Or simply on the great parts of school instead of the bad parts.  Once we took the wind out of her sails, per say, she started gliding and doing so much better. 

I'm grateful for inspiration and a Father in Heaven who not only loves me, but loves my daughter and inspires me and Braden on how to raise her best.  This advice has been extremely helpful.

Any Advice?

You already know how the first day of school went.  The second day started with "I don't want to go to school today."  But she survived, even though she cried again at the beginning.  But today started with "I dont' want to go to school today.  Please don't make me," and hiding in the corner, not helping get dressed, dragging her feet every step to the car. 

I asked her why, what was happening, and she told me she doesn't have anyone to sit with at lunch, how she's afraid of the whistle at recess and gym, how a couple boys have pushed her, how she's the only one who cries, how everyone else knows each other already and she feels new. 

I tried really hard to focus on the good parts of school, how Heavenly Father can help her, how she can reach out and be a friend, how she's not the only one who is afraid, how she can find a friend to sit with at lunch.  But nothing hleped.  When I took her to her classroom this morning, the tears came, she clung to me, and she begged me to take her back home. 

Even though I know exactly how she's feeling, I don't know how to help her thru this.  I know it takes time, that next week will be better, and then next week will be better than that, and so forth.  But what can I do to help her thru this every morning?  When she comes home from school, she loved it.  But in the morning, she's nervous, afraid, and doesn't want to go.

Have you had experience with this?  What have you done that has helped?  I really would appreciate any help you might have.

Happy Birthday Goose!

Wow, was it really just Goose's 2nd birthday?!  I can't believe she's 2!  And yet, of course I can.  This child is a dream.  An absolute dream.  We all adore her and love her smiles, her funnies, her happiness, her cuddles, her loves, and her friendship.  She is learning so much and makes us all so happy. 

A few things about Avery:

She loves books, puzzles, dolls, and her blanket. 
She can count to six without help and then counts "nine, twelve, thirteen, six, nine...there's nine!"
She knows all her letters in the alphabet, some also with their sounds and others with associated words, like A for Avery!
She could spend all day outside just enjoying being outside. 
She loves playing with her sisters and has recently developed a sweet friendship with Taryn.
She sleeps great, doesn't like lunch, and loves oatmeal.
She loves to say the prayer and at every meal the conflict arises "No, Avery pray."  "No, Avery, it's Keara's turn."  "Avery pray lunch."  "Okay, you can say it for lunch."  And then she reminds us all day that she'll say it at lunch.

Though her prayers have recently turned to "Dear Heavenly Father, Amen" "No, Avery, thank thee for this day" "Amen."  "Say day"  "Day.  Amen"  "No, thank you for our food."  "Amen."  "No, say food."  "Food, Amen."  You get the idea.

She loves her mommy...much to daddy's chagrin.  She is a cuddler, which I love!

She is seriously the sweetest, cutest thing we've ever met and I can't even begin to tell you all about her.  She is just so fun! 

When we'd say "Happy birthday Avery", she'd reply with "Mmm-hmmm."  You had to be there.  She's working so hard on getting her little fingers to cooperate and show that she's two years old.  But apparently, she understands how many fingers she's holding up because this morning, she held up three instead of two and when Braden asked how old she was, she looked at her hand and said "Three!"  This afternoon, when I asked, she held up four fingers and said "Four!"  I didn't realize she knew that.

Anyway, here are some pics from her birthday celebrations.  Braden had class basically from 9-9 on her actual birthday, so we had some minor celebrations that day and then had her real celebration tonight with my brother's family.  I know these are a lot of pics, but there are a few in her you HAVE to see, so at least scroll thru them, even if you don't read about them.


Her birthday began with opening "presents" that Keara had wrapped...library books, some of Avery's books, a play phone we have, and a baggie of animal crackers.  She wrapped them all in different colored construction paper, wrote "Avery, Lov Keara" on all of them, and then beamed for 24 hours waiting to give them to her.  It was so tender and Avery absolutely loved every one.

 This girl is not only beautiful, but she is also a complete HAM!  She is so funny and she knows it.

 I cannot believe how grown up she is!  Look at her!  Wasn't it just yesterday...??

 After naps, the girls and I headed over to these beautiful (free) gardens that are just 5 minutes from our house.  The gardens are H.U.G.E.  And stunning.  We loved this particular pathway lined with pink, Pink, PINK!

 Taryn loved this flower "as big as my head!"  I learned tonight it is called the "Dinner Plate" something...

 I love these three girls!  What a treasure to have daughters and for these girls to have sisters.  I know how much I adore my sisters and I am grateful these girls have each other.

 When we got home, we had ice cream with sprinkles and practiced blowing out candles. 

Tonight, we opened her real presents with my brother's family.  She was so excited!  She definitely figured out this whole unwrapping thing by the end of the night.

When we were in my brother's ward (church congregation), Avery would always ask to play with his watch.  Actually, she would do that any time she was with him.  He always graciously let her.  A few weeks ago, he got a new watch but didn't throw away his old one.  Instead, he wrapped it for her and gave it to her tonight.  When she opened it, she immediately hopped up and went over to put it on his arm.  Finding another one there, she was very confused!  But then she was very excited to have one for herself.  It is definitely going in the church bag.

Avery's favorite present was this baby doll and doll stroller.  She was then doubly excited to open her next present from Grandma...another doll!!  Tonight, she is happily sleeping with her own two babies.  It is adorable.  And she is thrilled to have her own stroller.  No more sisters being left out!

Okay, get ready for this.  Braden had this great idea to make a 3-D cake, ever since we saw some episodes from "Ace of Cakes" on the cooking channel.  He got inspired, had ideas flowing, and insisted that he get to make her cake this year.  I haven't let him make a cake for our children since his last two ideas bombed MISERABLY.  But I decided to back off, though I still had serious doubts when he told me his ideas.  He has GREAT ideas, but the execution always seems to lack.  I was truly worried we wouldn't have a cake at the end of it.

But not only did we have a cake, we had the most AWESOME cake I have ever seen in real life.  It comes in close with my brother's toilet cake he made my nephew 14 years ago, though he insists this is actually cooler.  I may have to agree.  It was incredible.  I was so proud of Braden sticking with his ideas, taking advice when necessary, and just going with the creative juices that were flowing.  And we were all blown away by the result. 

Isn't it incredible!?!?!

You may be asking, why a pig?  Because pigs are Avery's favorite farm animal.  She loves them and does a perfect pig impression.  I'll try to get that video uploaded...

Oh, and of course, pigs are pink.  Braden graciously wore a pink shirt today, much to his daughters' delight.

I know there are a lot of pics of it and you're probably thinking, "why are there so many pictures?" Because I couldn't choose just one and I can't believe how amazing it is so I just look at picture after picture and think "Oh my goodness! That is crazy amazing!" Braden, I concede. You can make the cakes from now on.

This cracked us all up.  Avery reached up and broke off the curly tail and just popped it right in her mouth. 
 

Avery loved her cake, especially the marshmallow fondant. 

 Avery cake and presents, we ran back over to the gardens to show my brother's family how beautiful they are right now.  They LOVED them and I hope they'll come back while they're still beautiful. 

Happy birthday baby girl.  I guess you're not a baby anymore.  But we adore you and love you and can't get enough of you.  You light up our lives and our home and our hearts every single day.  You are such a joy and a total blessing to us.  Before you were born, I had a strong, distinct impression that you would be an angel to our family.  And you are.