Where Am I?

Wow.  Life is busy.  How does it get to be so busy?  Can't we all go back in time about 200 years when our main responsibilities were our families and homes?  Oh wait.  Those are STILL our main responsibilities.  Just add on top of it the other million things we cram into our lives and we have no more time left for our families and homes.  Back then, there were no t-ball leagues, no preschools, no workout gyms, no daily grocery store runs.  Going into town was a day trip.  Doing the laundry was a day chore.  Washing the dishes was an evening in and of itself.  Lets go back.

Last night I was thinking...

If each day we're supposed to spend 8 hours sleeping+1 hour exercising+1/2 hour reading our scriptures+1/2 hour in personal meditation and prayer, that leaves 14 hours in our day to do the other things.

We should shower, get dressed, do our hair, and put on makeup.  For me, that takes about 30 minutes.  But then, I have 3 girls to get ready.  So getting ready in the morning takes about an hour.  We have 13 hours left.  At night, we have the bedtime routine which includes pajamas, teeth brushed, stories, prayers, and then trying to get the girls to cooperate and go to sleep.  The process takes about an hour, sometimes less.  12 hours.

Then we have to make and clean up 3 meals a day.  Breakfast=1/2 hour (just cereal), lunch=30 minutes, dinner=1 1/2 hours (estimating low).  So for the eating part, we are now left with 9 hours and 30 minutes. 

At some point in the day, we spend about a half hour cleaning up toys, so now we have 9 hours of discretionary time. 

Personally, I change only 5 diapers a day.  Oh, what a glorious thing that is to say.  So, that's about 5-10 minutes a day.  No big deal.  But I also nurse my baby about 5 times a day.  Each feeding is about 10 minutes, so adding the diapers, I care for my baby for about 1 hour a day.  8 hours left.

The laundry usually happens once a day...and sometimes lingers for days on end...and in total it takes about an hour to wash, dry, fold, and put away.  7 hours.

If I drive Braden to work, going there and back in the morning and then afternoon takes about 45 minutes.  6 hours and 15 minutes.  When I have the car, that usually means we have somewhere to go, so errands, groceries, appointments, activities, classes...one of those usually takes at least 2 hours.

4 hours and 15 minutes.  We all go to the bathroom...lets just even it out to 4 hours.  I doin't know about you, but I spend about an hour a day referring my girls' arguments, getting things out for them, helping them with whatever it is they are asking for, etc.  3 hours.

Wouldn't it be great if we really did have three extra hours in a day?  That would mean our homes would be clean, our children happy, fed, and sleeping, our marriages intact, our spiritual lamps filled, and all our responsibilities taken care of.  Raise your hand if that sounds like your life.  In reality, those three hours get eaten up and at the end of the day, we are exhausted, our children are still crying in their rooms, our house is a mess, dinner is still on the table, and we haven't said more than 3 words to our spouse.  Now, raise your hand if that sounds like you.

Now, if we supposedly have 3 hours of time left to do with what we want, where do they go?  Sometimes, dates.  Other days, bills.  Other days blogging (I know, I shouldn't be doing this right now).  Other days, crafts/hobbies.  Other days, gardening.  Other days, developing a talent.  Other days, babysitting someone else's kids.  Other days, baking.  Other days, being sick.  Other days, taking care of someone who is sick.  Other days, service.  Other days, church service/worship.  Other days, travel.  Other days...you get the idea.  Most of us spend at least an hour on the computer in a day, broken up here and there. Looking up a phone number, checking and sending emails. Whatever it is, its an hour gone. What about reading a book? Talking to family on the phone? Preparing a lesson?

Imagine that you have other demands that most people wouldn't have, like a sick child who has 5-10 appointments a week...every week. Or that you are a working mom. That takes away countless hours of time that most of us get to work with. How can you possibly get it all done?
So where in that slew of things is maintaining a home?  Playing with kids?  Going to the park or on a walk?  Reading stories?  Drawing and painting with the kids?  Going on family adventures?  Working together?  When I wonder why I don't have enough time to do all the things I need to and want to do, I guess I need to reevaluate when and where I am putting my priorities.  It's not that I don't HAVE the time.  It's that I don't TAKE the time. 

Remember the rocks and pebbles analogy?  If you fill up a vase with pebbles and then try to put the rocks in, you won't be able to get them in.  But if you put the rocks in first and THEN pour in the pebbles you'll be able to get everything in place.  I guess I need to choose what my rocks are and make sure those happen first thing every day.  Then, everything else that happens in the day will fit too, or at least it won't be the important things that get left behind day after day.

So, the next time you're wondering where other people get the time to change a lightbulb or play with their kids, remember that for every minute they are choosing to do those things, they are choosing to not be doing something else.  If you want certain things to happen, slow down, take a look, and then choose for yourself how you're going to be spending your discretionary time.  We live in a cluttered world with cluttered lives and cluttered families and homes. 

Personally, I think its time for spring cleaning.  Better late than never.